The Guide to Dating Me, Or Not

I’m horrified with myself. Again. But this time, my shame has nothing to do with a good-natured man. (Sorry, folks: the dry season continues.) It’s this: how did you all let me get away with calling myself a dating blogger when I have not, in fact, seen every single episode of “Sex and the City”?

You may recall, from a few days ago, my chafing at the lack of plotlines on the show that deal with how Carrie’s love life is affected by her writing about it–and my friend Nari’s rejoinder that there is, in fact, an episode on the subject. She was right: somehow, I missed it. Where could I possibly have been? (Actually, I think I know: in Austria, attempting to ride a bike and periodically fit into a dirndl.)

It’s from the fifth season, and it’s called “The Big Journey.” It’s the one where Carrie and Samantha take Amtrak to San Francisco–nominally for Carrie’s book reading, but really so she can see Big and, she presumes, get laid. Which is timely, because S and I are taking a “big journey” of our own next week–a ten-hour road trip that may or may not be partially motivated by the prospect of some potential on the other end. (I speak entirely for myself, and I say no more. For now.)

Of course, once they arrive and Carrie sees Big, all he wants to talk about is what she reveals about their relationship in her new book. He thwarts her efforts at seduction with repeated cries of, “But Carrie, I don’t want you to get hurt again!”

Which is exactly what I’m worried about.

The other night my friend D paused from encouraging me to reject people as frequently as possible to declare that he thought any man interested in dating me should read the blog.

“It’s basically the Guide to Dating Elizabeth!” he exclaimed. “I’d direct any guy who wanted to date you to go read and study up.”

I told him I thought that was interesting, because in my mind this reads more like a Guide to How Elizabeth is Crazy and Neurotic. Some of you may be shocked to read this, but in person I come across as rather laid back. As we’ve discussed, however, laid-backness (along with complexity of character) is not especially interesting, and therefore, I fear, gets lost somewhere between my Google-stalking and compulsive harping about unavailable men.

I’ve yet to really find out, though, which of us is right. I know there are some straight men reading the blog. Possibly some straight men who have been interested in me in the past. But whether they’d still be interested in me, after getting a load of all this?

It remains to be seen.

For now, I’m going to play dumb and keep in mind Carrie’s response when Big objects to her creative rendering of their relationship: “Oh, don’t worry!” she assures him. “It’s fiction!”

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